A couple of weeks ago Bennett picked this flower, roots and all, and brought it inside as a gift to me.
I was just a little agitated because I didn’t even plant these this year, it came up in a totally random place, and it sprouted way later than it really should have. It just seemed like it was meant to be there. I’ve really been trying to pick my battles, so I filled a vase with water and stuck it in the windowsill with little hope that it would last.
I haven’t written a post in quite a while. I was really struggling with some things that I needed to figure out and I just didn’t feel like I could write anything without sounding dreary and depressing. I had what I felt was a very rough year at work and as the year continued, more and more things started to pile on. It wasn’t all bad, but when I looked around I saw family members battling cancer, a dear friend doing the same, and a young cousin that lost his life in a tragic car accident. I felt like I had done my very best at school and wasn’t seeing the results I expected to see. I was very much “in the dumps”.
I kept thinking I must have done something to have so many negative things going on around me. As much as I thought of it, I couldn’t find a “why” so I started praying about it more. I started noticing that these people who were dealing with these things on a first-hand basis weren’t asking “why me”. They were praying for God’s help and praising him for small miracles. I saw them finding strength in Him. I saw them helping others find strength. I also saw families coming together and finding peace after the loss of my cousin and then the passing of my friend at the end of the summer.
I know that none of these individuals or their families have completely overcome the issues they are and have been dealing with, but I know that things have been made easier because of their relationships with Him.
I have really been working on my relationship with God and have been trying to praise Him and turn to him in my time of need rather than depending solely on myself. I feel a new peace, less worry, and more strength. I know that He has a plan for me and will not make me carry the weight on my own. I feel better at home and at work and I know that my family and my students are benefiting from my renewed spirit and positive attitude.
Tonight I am writing in honor of and praying for my cousin Lora, her new baby Harper, her husband, and twin girls. Lora delivered Baby Harper last Sunday at 26 weeks. He weighed in at 1 lb 9 oz and is fighting hard right now. You can read more about Lora and sweet Baby Harper on her blog Raising Steppe Sisters.
One of my favorite lines in a Grateful Dead song says “Once in a while you’ll be shown the light, in the strangest of places, if you look at it right”. When I looked at that flower tonight, growing in a vase with just a little water and sunlight, I thought of myself and the happiness I’m feeling from getting that necessity that’s been lacking in my life and of little Harper thriving in less than favorable conditions. I know that both of us will be just fine as long as we trust in the Man upstairs.
Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all He has done. Philippians 4:6